The importance of being a 'flock'

  I recently overheard a conversation wherein a gentleman said, "Today’s kids just don’t get it. They only think about themselves. They are self-centered and lazy."

  I boldly interrupted this man and explained why I did not agree with him. I gave him my most recent example of a group of kids who do get it. These young men and young women are very concerned about the welfare of others. They understand what the word "team" means and are very, very far from lazy. I have spent the past few months watching the Gila Ridge swim team carefully. I want to tell you the truth about our youths today.

  The Gila Ridge swim team has 34 members. This team is maintaining the high level of academic excellence that has become a trademark of their school. Their swim coach recently said, "I am proud to say that the Gila Ridge swim team was the top team for having the most eligible players throughout the season. This proves our student athletes work hard both in and out of the water."

  This group of young men and women knows what it means to be a team. Practice began for these kids in August. It was hot in August! This team did not spend all of their time in the pool. I watched them providing water for each other. I watched them cheer each other on as they ran in the blistering heat. I watched a group of kids who were more concerned about others than they were for themselves.

  As I sat at a recent swim meet, I watched the kids sitting together in groups giving each other encouragement and support for the upcoming events. They were cheering for each other and encouraging teammates from the pool deck. Someone (the coaching staff) took the time to teach these kids about the word "team"… which is not easy with 34 high school students.

  Whether Coach Eggers or Coach Judge ever told the "duck story" I don’t know. But I do know these kids were taught the duck story.

  The duck never asks itself it is a duck or not. A duck flies south in the fall and north in the spring, never questioning "why." It is a duck after all. Ducks fly in formation, each taking its turn leading the flock in flight. When the lead duck gets tired, it fades from the front and is enveloped back into the fold of the flock. Another duck naturally takes its place. That is what ducks do.

  Stephen R. Covey said, "Synergy comes naturally from the quality of the relationship, the friendship, trust, and love that unites people. I don’t know if ducks love one another, what I do know is that ducks never question the importance of team building, training, whether their flock represents them well enough, or if another flock might be a better fit for them." (Just so you know … ducks fly 71 percent farther than any single duck that flies on its own.)

  These great youths each took their turn leading this year. Equally important, they let others take their own turn leading. Each team member had a chance to lead and each had the opportunity to follow. The amazing thing was - they were all happy about it. Never once, did any member of the team express concern that the other "ducks" weren’t doing well enough. This group of kids never wondered if another "flock" was better for them. They were committed to helping, leading, and following. They got it!

  A recent study defined "team" when it stated, "What does it mean to be part of a team? It means you are part of a group who have come together to achieve the same goals. You are piece of the puzzle." The Gila Ridge swim team each had their own goals, but their most important goal was for the team. They were more than willing to adjust their individual goals for that of the team. They each realized they could not all swim every event they wanted. It honestly didn’t seem to matter to them. These kids did not seem to be jealous of those who were better than them. They showed support and admiration and were committed to raising their own standard of excellence to match those teammates.

  Two big pieces of this team puzzle were the coaches. I was impressed with the respect they showed toward every member on the team. They were encouraged to do their best, to demonstrate sportsmanship and above all to become part of the team. Coach Eggers said, "It is extremely important for each athlete to show respect for their teammates and coaches, support the team and the team concept, win with grace and most importantly lose with dignity." It is my opinion that not one of these kids lost anything this entire season - they all came out winners for having learned the value of respect, hard work and the importance of teamwork. They are all winners and have demonstrated grace in the process.

  Why does this matter? This matters to me as a parent and as a professor of family studies. We all are part of a much larger team. We are all part of a family. We are all part of a team at work. We are all part of a team in our communities. When one person tries to be the big shot, that person will end up hurting the entire team. They might be the lone victor, but everyone loses in the end.

 As long as our young adults continue to focus on "team," they will contribute to their schools, their families, their places of employments, their communities, and their nation. They will lead when others are tired and follow when someone else needs that opportunity. They will arrive as a "flock" to their destination - which is greatness!

  I learned a lot these past few months from the Gila Ridge swim team. Thank you for teaching the teacher!

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Christina Hawkey is a professor of family studies at Arizona Western College. She can be reached through e-mail at christina.hawkey@azwestern.edu.