Shopping for jeans last week turned out to be an enlightening and frustrating experience.
I just wanted a simple pair of pants. But I discovered jeans aren't so simple anymore. They come in a plethora of sizes and styles: slim fit, low-rise, boot cut, straight leg, relaxed fit, regular fit, etc.
I automatically picked up the regular fit, but I didn't like their style.
For laughs, I checked out the skinny jeans. Not even my arms would fit through those straws they call leg openings. Skinny jeans and eyebrow-shaping are two young men's trends I just don't get.
I ended up getting some black, stone-washed pants that I didn't realize were low-rise style until I tried them on at home. I looked like a geriatric sagger wannabe.
Report me to the fashion police, because any 50-year-old man with his underwear and belly hanging over his pants should be charged with a crime against nature.
I'm returning the offending pants this weekend – and the world will be a prettier place because of it.