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It takes courage to help victim

A few weeks ago we heard about the case of Darien Tucker, beaten to death by gangs in Chicago while dozens stood by and did nothing. Now, comes the case of a 15-year-old girl in Richmond, Calif., who was gang-raped outside her high school homecoming dance while others stood by and did nothing. In both cases, few if any bystanders have been willing to work with the police.

The truth, after the media coverage has died down and local politicians have made a share of promises, nothing will be done. Then again, do we expect the police to have a crystal ball to foretell the next crime? Only the ones at the scene have the power to prevent a crime or ensure the timely capture of criminals.

I'd like to raise some questions of the teens and 20-somethings who read this column and ask what would you do if you were in that situation if you were at the scene?
Imagine you are standing somewhere minding your own business when you see a violent tornado forming near you. It's threatening violence to another teen, maybe you know them, maybe you don't.

What will you do?

Let's agree what not to do if you are alone. Don't rush in the middle and try to stop it or you will be the next victim. Can you find the strength to move away, separate yourself from the herd? Get out and away from the crowd and reach out to a rescuer?
Yes, you could play it safe, be one of those who pulls out a cell phone camera and snaps away. Can you live with that and sleep well at night? Is that the level of help you'd want as a victim?

Will you stand there and cheer on the perpetrators to stay on their good side? If so, are you any better than they are?

Do any of you seemed captured by the thought that "he or she deserved it." Does anyone "deserve" to have brutalities brought against them? Because he studies? Because she had too much to drink? That gives a pack of wolves license to rip them up - do you really believe that?

If the beater or rapist is your friend, your instinct may be to protect them. What are they thinking? They will demand your loyalty as a spider does from a fly. You will become an accomplice or you will become the next meal. Is that fine with you?

I know fear of retaliation is real. That's because the threat is real. No amount of talk will convince you the police will protect you 24/7. Should that fear paralyze you from doing anything?

The Richmond rape went on for over two hours near school property. Could you have slipped away and told a teacher what happened so she could have called the police? Or would you have stayed quiet? Is a silent life worth living?

This is where courage comes in. If you've ever learned the "Golden Rule," the "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" did you think it costs nothing to get there?This is more than sweet religious prose. It costs whatever you are willing to pay to be truly human, to care.

Ironically, it often takes very little to do much. A walk away to make a phone call is usually all it takes. Being willing to identify perpetrators takes more courage. Can you find it within yourself to come forward and take them off the streets?

There is a "bystander syndrome" where the larger the crowd doing nothing, the more likely you as a bystander will be to do nothing. That was true with lynch mobs. Maybe it works the other way - if given a spark. One person who says "get them off of her" and they do. One person who says "call the cops" and someone does.

Acting in defense of others will cost you. You'll be called a "snitch." Friends will turn away. Some will hate you. You may have to watch your back.

On the other hand, you'll receive the gratitude of the victim and that person's family and friends. You'll carry a new and deserved kind of respect.

---
Mike Shelton is a Yuma resident and guest columnist for the Yuma Sun. E-mail him at mikshelt@msn.com


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